If you follow me on Instagram, then you know I’ve been checking in with a lot of Piyo and TIU workouts. However, what you might not know is that I’m part of an accountability group for the second month in a row. This group was completely free and meant as an encouragement to reach physical, nutrition and personal goals and created by Anna, a Beach Body Coach. We check in every night with how we did on nutrition, our workouts and usually one other question such as sharing something positive or what’s going on in your life.
I did my first group in September and with a little less than a week until the finish I’d seen zero results. I was actually sparked into some self-reflection by a “before and after” picture that Anna posted of one of her clients. I thought – why isn’t that me? I can do this, but why aren’t I? Why have I been “trying” for months but seeing no change? I realized I wasn’t seeing change because I wasn’t putting my all into the program. I was half-assing it and finally recognized why:
Fear.
I am afraid of failing. I am afraid of not being good enough. I am afraid of falling into my old restriction and social isolation patterns. I’m also afraid of succeeding and having to live up to that image and not being able to fail again.
Previously, I had separated my eating issues from my religion. But I came to understand that my actions were actually sinful in nature – selfishness, gluttony and laziness. I don’t want to give up my over-eating habits because in the moment I enjoy it, even if I don’t afterwards – just like many other self-destructive behaviors. I realized that to succeed in becoming the person I want to be, I have to give up the control and have faith in following God. I need to trust that by following in Christ’s footsteps, I will have a more fulfilled and happy life.
I want to emphasize that is how I feel about MY journey and the thoughts going on in MY head when I am making my daily decisions. Not everyone who has issues with food could or should consider it sinful. But I realized that for ME, eating to stuff down my feelings until I felt ill was not how I want to live and not how God wants me to live.
So what do I do? I joined Anna’s group again for this month. And maybe I’ll have to do it another time too. Change is scary. Change takes time, a daily commitment and true introspection. It’s not going to be easy, but I know that if I turn to Christ for strength and guidance I will eventually make a change.
Have you ever let fear hold you back?
Do you have trouble doing what’s right for you?
This post was like a huge eye opener for me. I’m going to take your approach and not let fear run my life when it comes to my goals with health and fitness. Thanksnfornaharing your journey. Best of luck!!
I have also dealt with a great deal of eating/body issues and I know that fear has kept me from being my best self. I’m okay with my body right now but not happy. I am so afraid to whole heartedly begin another “health kick” as I do not want to become out of control like in the past.
I think the idea of an accountability group is awesome. It keeps you on track and others are there to notice and be there for you if things get extreme. The only downfall would be comparing yourself to others. Just remember everyone’s timeline and story is different. I believe in you! You’re doing great. Accepting and facing your fears are imperative to healing. Another positivity quote for today:
“If you never try, the answer is always no.”
I hear you! Sometimes I have trouble working from home. I will just be bored and start stuffing my face and then I realize – whoa – that was totally unnecessary. The challenge is training myself to think twice before even STARTING that cycle, so that I think “wait, do I need this? is this actually good for me?” I have not really connected it to my spiritual life intentionally, but I have found myself adding to my morning prayers, “God, help me be intentional with what I use to fuel my body today.” It’s crazy how all things tie together! Sounds like you’re having a similar experience in that regard.
yes I think each time I don’t really give up sugar is fully about fear, fear of never enjoying it again, always being on the outside of a group of friends, what if I do and it doesn’t matter. GOOD for you!!
Oh man, change is SO hard. And I totally understand your feelings. But, I think it’s SO awesome that you’ve been able to recognize this all, get up, and try again! That says a lot. You’ve got this! xoxo
I’m not so afraid of taking the next step, but rather making sure the time is right.
girl you can DO IT!!!
Good post Katie, common issue for many of us. Keep at it, “poco a poco”.
I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again, you’re so brave & so wise to really reflect on how something is making you feel. Self awareness is so so key in any type of change!
re: thinking you can’t fail once you “succeed” is BS. 😉 Only people who are successful know how truly many times they have to fail. Any no one is perfect, so there is no “end” anyways. This is your journey, and it’s so inspiring to watch it beautifully unfold!
xo
I totally understand where you are coming from! I am such a perfectionist and hate failing at anything! I am really working on this area of my life too. One scripture that is really helping me is gal. 5:22. It says that one of the fruits of the spirit is self control. Having more of God helps you make the right decisions yourself. So simple but I forget it all the time.
oh yes – we have let fear stop us from trying something or doing something that we wanted to do. It’s silly really, as we feel everyone has a story or has something to offer to the world. getting over that fear is the hard part! but we believe things happen for a reason. xo
hugs