This weekend I had a conversation with someone about confidence; specifically, confidence at work. However, I think it could be applied to all areas of our lives. We were talking about my job search and I told him I felt like I was unqualified for most of the jobs that I was applying for. I told him I’d always felt like one day the veil would be pulled back and people would realize that I’m not smart, I’m not capable and, basically, that I would be failure.
Don’t we all feel like that in some area of our lives? That we’re just going to fail? That we’re not good enough? I know I do, and way too much.
He’s done well working his way up the ladder in a short amount of time, and he told me that for him it’s all about confidence. It’s about how no matter how many times you mess up or how many times you’re unsure of yourself, you charge forward with confidence that you can do anything and eventually you will convince both those around you and yourself of the same. Basically, “fake it till you make it.”
This afternoon I’m volunteering with a legal aid clinic and, honestly, I’m really nervous. It’s my first time working on my own, rather than shadowing, which I’d done back in May. I’m nervous that I’m going to mess up, that I’m going to look silly or incompetent, that I’m going to fail. But walking in with that kind of attitude isn’t going to get me anywhere. If I walk in feeling like I’m going to fail, then I’m probably going to fail.
So today I’m going to fake it until I make it. I’m going to walk in with confidence that I know what I’m doing (which in all honesty I do), that I’ve done this a million times, and that whoever I’m working with probably isn’t as concerned with how silly I look or feel, but is much more concerned with whatever issue they’re dealing with.
I challenge all of you to do the same this week: in some area of your life that you feel uncertain about, that you might be a failure, fake it. Convince yourself and those around you that you are confident and capable; that you can do anything you set your mind to.
Does anyone else ever feel this way?
How do you gain confidence?
I love this post, Katie!! I feel like all of us struggle with feeling this way at some point, especially if you set big goals, and go after a challenging career. I’m sure you will do awesome! PS: Can’t wait to meet you this week!!
Yay, so excited for HLS!
Yes!!! I couldn’t agree more! Cody is one of the most confident people I know, and he walked into his interviews when job searching like “Why wouldn’t someone want to hire me?”. I was so impressed by him, and wouldn’t ya know it, he landed a job with one of the most reputable financial companies in the country. I’ve also lived by this in situations when I’ve been super nervous, and I ended up having a blast and doing really well.
You will do AMAZING today girl! Knock their socks off! Praying for you!
That’s exactly how my brother is (the person I talked to), I just don’t have that confidence!
Great post, Katie! I used to be really nervous to take initiative because what if I messed up? Now, I try to see everything as a learning experience and I know that people aren’t hoping to see me fail. It’s okay to ask questions and to screw up from time-to-time, it happens and we learn from it and move on!
Good luck today, I’m sure you’ll do well!
It’s definitely important to remember people aren’t hoping to see us fail!
Good luck! That’s the way to go when you’re feeling unsure. You know you have all the prep, and honestly, even professionals in every kind of business will tell you that they feel unsure about their skills years into their line of work. It’s all about attitude!
Definitely, thanks Ang!
No need to fake it. You’re awesome and will do WONDERFUL!
Thanks, Tina!
I definitely felt that way after law school – but just remember, you made it this far because you’re capable and strong!! You deserve success as much as the next person. Just keep doing what you’re doing and it will all fall into place.
Thank you, it’s great to hear that from someone else who went to law school!
Very much agreed! Having more confidence was the number 1 feedback I got my first job out of college. My boss literally said to ‘fake it till you make it’ haha. I’m better at it now, but it’s easier said than done that’s for sure.
That’s great that your boss gave you that advice, very true!
I love the idea of faking it til you make it, but I also think there are times when you need to break it all down and share with someone how you feel. At least for me I can get so caught up in pushing myself towards something that I get lost, and need help finding a balance.
Definitely important to say how you feel in your personal life, but I’m thinking more job interview/first few months of work
I feel like this a lot at the moment, but your friends advice is very good – I think faking it till you make it is the way to go! I’m sure you’ll be fine at the legal clinic, I think that initial fake it till you make in confidence is sometimes all that is needed to get you to the point where you develop real confidence from seeing how great you are!
Thanks, Laura!
you go girl! loved this post!
Thanks, Julianna!
It’s called “impostor syndrome” and it seems to be common in lots of smart young women, myself included! And honestly, I still struggle with it all the time, but “faking it until you make it” really helps! I always did that in job interviews, and I had several comments along the lines of “wow, you seem really confident!” No one needs to know that I’m not! it might seem strange at first, but keep doing it and you’ll keep gaining confidence. Soon you’ll know that you ARE smart and awesome and all those things 🙂
Thanks, Trixie! It’s definitely something I need to work on!
Great post! I definitely feel the same a lot of the time and have yet to find what works for me.
Hope it works for you and you have a great week!
Thanks, Courtney!
GET IT GURL
creeper
oh girl, i am so with you! i fake it till i make it all the time! It really works, just gotta smile and go for it. You will be awesome!
Thanks, Lindsay!
This is a great reminder. I’m heading into some tough weeks of classes right now and instead of telling myself that “everyone” but me is getting it, I just need to trudge on and fake it. And by “fake it” of course I mean study my butt off 😉
Good luck with class, it’s always hard to be in an environment where you’re being compared with your peers. You just have to focus on doing your best!
I just started my first REAL job after finally becoming a registered dietitian as a director of the child nutrition program for a school district. With no managerial experience, I am constantly afraid I’m not good enough or have no clue what I’m doing so I feel you there. Thanks for the boost of confidence and good luck! You’ll do great!!
I’m sure you’ll be great too, Emily!
love this!! it’s soooo true. think we all have those doubts and moments of rethinking everything – as we if we are not good enough. But we are 🙂 and yes faking it helps!!
You’ll do great!!! Believe in yourself – something we tell ourselves several times a day!
HUGS
Thanks, ladies!
Okay clearly we were on the same brain wave length here when we decided to write our posts for today! Confidence seems to be the theme huh 🙂 I have been told this before, to fake it until you make it and I do agree with doing this… and it really can make a solid, positive difference for you with effort. It sounds like you are doing just that Katie. I don’t blame you for being nervous, but keep that CONFIDENCE up as much as possible and I think you will reap the rewards in time
I agree – we were totally on the same wavelength!
great post! i’m a big believer in faking it til you make it! 🙂
Thanks, Linz!
Confidence is a hard thing, especially in a job situation. I hate acting all confident if I can’t deliver. But, I think being honest with yourself (and your bosses!) about your strengths and weaknesses can help with the confidence factor.
Thanks Carly!
I bet you did fine at the legal aid clinic! Something my boss at my first job out of college told me was it was okay to say “I don’t know.” That people would rather you tell them you don’t know the answer but will find out than make something up or tell them the wrong thing. I try to keep this in mind when I’m working on something where I don’t feel 100% certain. It’s really helped!
I agree – I’m always ready to admit when I don’t know the answer, I’d rather do that than be completely wrong!
Great post and great advice. It helps me to remember that the people I think are so much more experienced/prepared than me…are also just faking it (which is to say, none of us are faking it and we really are all this awesome :))
[…] everyone! Thanks so much for all your comments on my post Monday, I guess a LOT of us “fake it ‘till we make it!” I’m gearing up to head out to the Healthy Living Summit in Minneapolis tomorrow (bright and EARLY […]